Acroama

Honestly I’m pretty upset. And that’s rare for me. This is Faje by the way. I’ve had tons of friends, who mean a lot to me, suddenly start acting all weird around me. They usually made fun of my little mandibles; and though that does hurt my feelings, the thing that makes me the most upset is everything that’s happened with the rat. Or as they call it, the “rant.”  The other roaches don’t think I pay much attention to the human world. And though I’m no pollentician — I pay more attention than they think. And one thing I distinctly know — is that the fuzzy long-toothed creature with a werm for a tale — is called a fr-eaking “rat.” Sorry, I’m usually not this upset about stuff, but everything that’s happened recently really rubs me the wrong way. I’ve lost all my friends. And worst of all, they say it’s all my fault.  NOW THAT ALL THE humans are gone we’ve gone outside of the house a lot more. We found a lot more food and that’s good, but now that there are no more humans we’re ...

The following story is one of our most beloved and important stories. We tell these to those who are feeling left out or are in need of a good pal. We apologize to any humans reading this because we roaches don’t quite understand your world. Hopefully this gives you an understanding of what our world is like, and shows you our hopes for a more friendly future between humans and roaches.  EEK, FAJE AND LUMP were scuttling through the walls of the home making their usual rounds. It was 3:00am — the time when humans would least notice the little cockroaches nibbling away at their food. When suddenly they heard a loud and deep, BOOM!  A massive explosion had erupted throughout the land!  Ruminski and the U.F. had been threatening a nukleon war for over 5 decades now. After the president of the U.F. raked and cooked the Ruminskin president’s cousin’s nephew’s step-sister’s niece — it was the straw that broke the cambles back. When the president of Ruminski was woken and told t...